Wednesday 11th July, a beautiful day for cycling and a very impressive turnout. All in all 15 of us took part. The destination was Pontyberem and usually we have a few challenging climbs but Big Trev's back was playing up so he chose a gentle route. Out the usual way up the cycle track to meet the second contingent at Pont y Cob Road, through Bynea then up onto the cycle track at Felinfoel. The track follows the old railway line from Llanelli, through Cynheidre and on to Tumble so it is a gentle gradient.

We were just negotiating a steep slope up to the track and Big Trev wanted a word with me.

" You know Walter has this barbecue every year" he says.

Well I knew of course and I was looking forward to it this year because he only lives down the road and to stagger back from there at the end of an enjoyable evening would be a relatively easy feat.

"Yes, looking forward to it" I said

" Well, he can't do it this year" he said.

What a disappointment, you see I missed it last year because I was away and I really had been looking forward to it,

Big Trev continued "We wondered whether we could have it at your place"

To say that I gulped would be an understatement but I will say it anyway.

I gulped and that was an understatement.

I could, however, think of no reason why not and indeed it was bound to be fun and would also repay the neighbours for all the times that they have had parties in their back garden without inviting me. I mean really - have they no idea how much fun I can be!

Colin said that he would dig out a barbecue he had won in a raffle years ago and had been lying in his shed ever since and my gas barbecue could easily be cleaned up. I could do a big bowl of chilli and rice, sausages and beefburgers on the barbecue and a fruit salad for afters.

A piece of cake!!

So there we are - August 3rd it is. See you all in my back garden but bring some booze!!

As there was such a crowd of us Big Trev thought it may be a good thing to phone Caffi Cynnes in Pontyberem to forewarn them, out comes his mobile.

" Hello, bore da" he says "we're a group of cyclists and we're on our way for lunch with you."

"Sorry, I don't understand what you're saying " she says, and confusion followed.

A suggestion was made from within the group that maybe better understanding would be achieved in Welsh so I was pushed forward towards the phone.

"Bore da" I said "Mae 'na tua bymtheg ohonon ni ar y fordd i gael cinio efo chi. Roedden ni'n meddwl basa'n beth da i'ch rhybuddio chi."

"Am faint o'r gloch fyddech chi yma?" she said.

"Tua chwarter wedi hanner dydd" I said.

"Iawn" she said

And it was as easy as that!

It was with great confidence therefore that we cycled on safe in the knowledge that they were not going to collapse under undue pressure. (Not like the poor chap at Trecastell - see Pipelines and Panoramas)

We arrived at staggered intervals which was convenient and I had been giving Phil some Welsh practice on the way so that he could give his order in Welsh. And he did - valiant man!

It was noted by someone that Phil and I had larger portions.

There are, indeed advantages and priveleges in speaking Welsh!

It must be noted here that some people have both a main course and a pudding!! No names, no pack drill!

So there we are on the homeward journey and a fairly long climb out to Pontyates during which journey I am advised that Colin has his 70th birthday this month but that Colin seems unwilling to tell us when it is. I have suspicions that it has already passed because he has spent most of the day listening to 'The Laughing Policeman' being played on repeat on a brand new IPod.

On your behalf, dear readers and pedallers, I sidle up to him and after yanking the earpieces out I engage him in friendly conversation. He seems suspicious but nevertheless seems to appreciate my friendliness.

We engage in deep conversations on subjects that only men can engage in. A bond of trust is formed.

"Was that IPod a birthday present? I asked casually.

"Well it was actually ," he confessed sheepishly.

"So when was your birthday?" I asked nonchalantly.

"Promise you won't tell" he said.

"Of course," I said "You know you can trust me."

"Well it was last Monday." he said

"So that'll be the 9th July then?" I said.

"Yep" he said

And, as it happens dear readers and pedallers, next year that falls on an Away Day. So what do you think we can do?

All suggestions, whatever their nature, will be carefully considered.

We reach Llanelli and by now the leading group have disappeared into the cafe. It seems that the Wednesday Riders are building up a habit of indulging in consuming food at every opportunity - so I joined them.

We would all be very grateful if you would keep that a secret. Please!

A good burn up from Penclacwydd to Gowerton to get rid of any guilt feelings and we coast the rest of the way. When I say 'we' I mean TGJC, Walter the Great and myself. A really good ride and about 52 miles for WtG and myself, more like 70 for TGJC by the time he gets home.

So, how do we do it? The photos perhaps give you a clue.

So that leaves only one question - Why do we do it?

Come with us, have fun then you'll understand!!

And finally!!

I was standing in the queue at the fags and lottery counter at Morrisons yesterday when an older man (most people are older than me!!) joined the queue.

"There's no point in you and these others wasting your money today," he said "I've got the winning ticket here!"

"Oh, I'm not here for a lottery ticket." I said with mock indignation.

"What, you buying fags then are you?" he said.

"Certainly not," I said "I just want to top up my phone card, I really don't have any vices."

"Just talking then, is it?" he said.

At that point I reached the head of the queue so the conversation ended but when I had finished I gave him a nudge and said "Best of luck with the lottery!"

He turned and said.

"Thanks pal, I'll remember you, don't worry."

I walked back to the car feeling very satisfied that my charm had won me a new friend who had great confidence in his winning ticket and, as a promise is a promise, some of those riches would soon be coming my way.

Perhaps I should have left him my name and address.

See you next week

Lew Spokes

Bike for sale click here for details

"Careful" Big Trev counting his money!		An avid Ride Report reader
More sauce for Walter Two posers together
Tea-time		Another two posers!
These are		what keep
us		going!